Self Worth and Attachment

Moving on...why is it so hard?

It may be the very idea that we are overly reliant on others to begin healing.  It may be the very idea that we are derailed from our path of healing where we are nothing but beings distracted by our need to feel comforted, validated and loved by others.  It may be the very idea that our insecurities lead us to hold on to others with such a firm grip where taking the next step into the unknown is too unbearable to conceive. Through this, we rely on others to give us a sense of Self.

As Eckhart Tolle states, "If you cannot look through [this] collective delusion, you will be condemned to chasing after things for the rest of your life in the vain hope of finding your worth and completion of your sense of self there...".  With respect to healing, we will be condemned to continually chase after a sense of calm and a strong sense of Self if we continue along the path of reliance and attachment to others.

If I say I love you and that I cannot bare to begin healing without your strength, I would have done our love a great disservice.  I agree with Tolle that "...we cannot really honor things if we use them as a means to...try to find ourselves through them".  I am only beginning to understand that "...sometimes letting things go is an act of far greater power than defending or hanging on" (Eckhart Tolle).  I am beginning to understand that it is okay to walk alone...to face uncertainty.  Equally important, it is okay to find my path by myself...for myself.  I will do this because I honor you.

How can we free ourselves from attachment? It is the very idea that "attachment to things [or people] drops away by itself when you no longer seek to find yourself in them...If you are aware that you are identified with a thing, the identificiation is no longer total" (Tolle).  To speak that you are the "awareness that is aware that there is an attachment...That's the beginning of the transformation of conciousness" (Tolle).